iMessage
I haven't stopped being mad. But to quote my favorite terrible cheesy rom com chick flick, you can be mad at a person and still miss them. My loneliness has outweighed my anger. So on the off chance you at any point gain the courage to say something to my face... instead of about me behind my back while lurking on my socials (like I have literally caught more then one person doing, iirk, embarrassing if you ask me!) Just know that you have my consent. I actually would talk to you. And probably a lot more civilly then you think.
I wish you would understand it's the abnormal behavior of my real life circle that makes me communicate abnormally in turn. Sometimes being told anything would have been better than being ignored by everyone in the world. Especially when you spent multiple times with me hanging out and being vulnerable. I am direct and honest. I have no hidden agendas or big secrets.
But I am so lonely and alone. And idc how ****** it might sound to say. It's not fair. I don't deserve it. I am not a mean spirited person. I do not make a habit of deceiving anyone. I don't lurk on the social media of people I don't know and don't like.
I give out a lot of compliments everyday. And I mean every single one. I hold the door open for people. I try to be polite the best I can. But all I get is gawked at and laughed at and manipulated.
Maybe someday you will realize just how much your silence enabled that.
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