iMessage
I think there is a reason why we didn't work. We can only get so close before we to trigger each other. This cycle is tiring.
You are hella smart, and resourceful. I think you were right to walk out all those years ago. Why did you make a half-assed attempt at returning?
To play with my feelings? Make sure I'm not really available for anybody else, even though you don't want to be with me. It's unfair.
I know you are going through a lot. I've always tried to be there.
But the lack of clarity is BS. The intermittent communication is hurtful. And continually choosing abstraction over transparency is disrespectful.
I love you. But I don't love this.
I'll probably always love you. But I've learned to live with your absence. I've woken up to the fact that you chose to leave. Chose distance over repair. Chose pain over love.
Today feels like acceptance. It's noticing and accepting that these patterns will always stay the same. It is me who needs to change. So, I'm choosing to break the loop.
Take care. I would say I'll see you around, but we both know that won't happen.
xx
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