Unsent text message to Nicholas

holy shi it was sooo good today. i missed u a lot. i really cried after i reached home. cried a lot. hate it that we cant be together. we both did accept it but somewhere it still lingers. what if we were together? things wouldnt be like this right? anyways i missed u a lot and i love you toooooo.

Finally realize that you don’t think about me when you don’t see me. Honestly. That’s worse than telling me “we need to hang out”, when I ask if you want to get a beer. You don’t think about me if we’re not at work, even when you say “it’s not the right time.” That sounds like there will be a right time. Brother it is…

After it all. Silence is, safe. Being alone has become normal. Disconnected from society & yet completely trapped in an endless battle of what & how to become free.

Letting go of the weight completely will probably be easier if I just ... leave it. Go where? How? No money & no car. What is left of my mission here…

She baits her breath with hurtful threats and hopes that I receive

To stoke my fears and draw me near and prays I’ll never leave

It’s just for fun They’re not the one It’s you and only you

She’ll tell me this and She’ll tell me that But she never tells the truth…

you’ll probably enjoy knowing that

No you dont act like a libra, libras are supposed to be charming. Stay safe out there. Be good, dont do anything I wouldnt do.