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To move on now. I cannot wait any longer hoping that someday you will open up to me again, talk to me again, let me know you again. Even when I know that you will never see me the same again, you will never love me again.
I am very well aware that I do deserve that and a lot lot more. I knew that all the while hoping you would let me apologise. You need my help and I try so hard to not **** it up and not be able to help you because I know you will stop talking to me and I won't be there for you, I would hate that. I try so hard to not tell you how I actually feel about you. How I miss you. How I think of you. How I would give up the world for you to be happy. To be with you again till death. How I love you. How you are the only one I have ever loved and probably ever will.
I will try my best to lose hope. Hope is the one thing that has been ******* me for the last 10 months.
I will try my best to not think of you.
I need to give myself a chance to be, if not happy, then not be miserable.
I will keep helping you the same. I still hope that you will reach out to me if you ever, ever need any help, any kind of help. I will be there even if I won't be able to tell you a thing.
I tried my best.
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