iMessage
I may act immaturely, but I will always acknowledge my wrongs when I recognize them. I want to start by saying that while I am a hurt person, I do not hurt people—at least never intentionally. When I failed to reassure you, it didn't come from a lack of trust. It came from hurt. I’m used to people leaving, but my heart still wasn't prepared for you to go. It really shook an unknown part of me. I didn’t know I could let someone in immediately and so willingly. I remember our first date so clearly. My body opened up to you, and then my defenses immediately kicked in to regain control. My mind actively searched for something to criticize, until I caught myself and thought, He’s perfect, what are you doing? But right after that, I said the very thing that ended the date. Uncontrollably, I was protecting myself—not from you, but from a past where no one ever stays. I wish I nurtured this connection better because I have so much respect for you and fondness. I never wanted to hurt you; I just wanted you to stay. I know words carry real weight, and I am sorry. I really hope I didn’t not further your worries enough to carry it on. I wish you well in life and you’re worth having to have know.
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