Unsent text message to Connor

There has always been something inherently wrong with me, Im too loud, too messy, too talkative, too much. Im not meant to be kept, I am meant for practice. Im the training wheels to learn on before I am outgrown for a real bike. Im not the girl you bring home to your mom, Im not the one you bring to events, Im the…

Idk if he even has an account anymore and don’t want to play tomb raider on here to find out.

Yes, I have 2 other accounts. None of the over the over the top woe is me damning some man to eternal hell/ picking him apart or poetically professing undying love/desire are me to him. Actually I don’t really post anything…

That I still think about u almost everyday. And I miss our friendship a lot. I wish we could’ve gotten closer and that we could’ve had more fun times together. I hope u are happy now wherever u are. I’ve been carrying this deep ache inside me since we stopped being friends and I’ve been struggling to let u go.

he asked me why i love you so much. i don't have an answer. should i? if i had one, would it still be love?

i love the way you treat me. i love the way you're so honest with yourself and me and everyone else. i love the way the sun makes your hair kindof reddish, sometimes, you know? like mine, but a slightly more…

"My life got better when I realized I didn't have to be nice. Nice got me used, stressed out and disrespected. I'm not nice. I'm a good person. There's a difference."

And I think a healthier way to frame this is:

My life got better when I learned to balance kindness with self-respect. Being considerate is important, but…

You make me think I am hard to love.