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You could have talked to me. I could have been there for you.
I do think you shut me out because you didn't love me or want me anymore. Because if you did love me, why wouldn't you try to talk to me? Give me the opportunity to fix things?
You made me feel like I wasn't worth loving because I was struggling and not progressing fast enough for your liking. Allegedly.
But hearing nothing from you for so many weeks. 0 attempt to fight for us just shows me that you didn't want us anymore. You gave up long before you tried to talk to me. How else can I think anything different?
I don't understand, even after all this time. I look at our photos and videos and I genuinely wonder what was real and what wasn't. You hid your feelings from me so much at the end that all I can do now is try and put the pieces together.
I don't wanna drive myself crazy anymore by wondering or rethinking all of our relationship because of that. I still love you. I would still work on things if you actually came back to me and showed me you wanted me and we could work on it together. I know you won't. I wish you would.
I hope someday I can let go of you, get rid of the hope that you'll come home to me. You never will. I want you to be happy. I hope you are. But right now I just feel so confused. I really wanna let go now...
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