Unsent text message to Joshua

I made you laugh one last time a meme about a joke you had when you were a little girl about how you couldnt pronounce stinky skunks you laugh I ask if it made your day you said it did told me I still use that one nobody gets my jokes. In the 14 years we've been in and out od each other's lives does anyone really know…

I think you did too, maybe that’s what we are supposed to do. Whatever the **** that means.

You took me for granted. You treated me like ****. You saw me as a convenience in your life.

But eventually, you will realize this. And you will miss me.

By that time, I will be long gone.

Good luck and goodbye.

I hate this. I hate this so much. I hate that I miss you, because you hurt me so much. I miss talking to you. Why? Why did you come into my life, make me feel loved, and then leave? You asked what I wanted, and I should have said you. I want you. I was nice to you. I was good to you, wasn't I? Is it because I did…

Ashton,

I miss you today, just as I do every day. I hope you have a wonderful day and find many things throughout that make you smile or laugh, even if they're corny.

Maybe some day you'll see that you were my entire world and that I'd do anything to make you happy, including letting you go. Maybe some day you'll…

I’m tired of overthinking everything. Every look, every word, every tiny interaction somehow becomes a full investigation in my head, and honestly, it only seems to create more pain than answers. So, for once, I’m going to keep it light. Your smile makes me want to headbutt you! Not in a violent way. More in a “you’re…