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Turns out I can have everything I wanted
Literally everything is falling into place,
Except now, I don't really want it.
I guess knowing I'm still at least two years away from the ability to relax into it. To enjoy it makes it harder to consider it. Will it even be worth my time then? Will all my time be lost?
It's funny because I've begged, and I've prayed, I've wanted nothing more
And now it's at my fingertips, all I have to do is walk through the open door
But because of everything that's happened already, I don't want to walk through anymore.
I feel too hurt. I want more. I now want what really nourishes me, what I crave and deserve.
I want something that's going to make my energy vibrate even higher.. not something that makes me feel like I need to be smaller. I don't want something to dim my light, I need an environment that's going to make it shine brighter.
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