Unsent text message to Brian

The only difference is that you aren't there anymore.

And somehow, after all this time, I still do it.

I don't understand how you could do this. How could you throw away all the memories, all the stories we had, like none of them mattered?

The bedtime stories I read to you. The things I did for you. The things I wanted…

Multiple people have voiced that they think i love you, even suggesting that there might be some feelings from your side too. They've stated those things both jokingly and seriously.

I would be a liar to say i haven't seen you in that light before but that was during a difficult time for me and it was more about that…

I miss you.

I’ve tried to find a more dignified way of saying that, but there isn’t one. I just ******* miss you.

It’s been eight weeks and there are still days when the absence of you feels enormous. Today is one of them. I miss talking to you. I miss laughing with you. I miss your body and your stupid face and the way…

I'm not jealous, I'm disgusted.You should have done better.You could have done better , but like I said , what a disappointment , i'm glad you heard me , because what the f* were you thinking , what the actual f* were you thinking

In the dark to think the I live was real. But when familiar patterns start I know the end. I can’t bare it. What is so hard with talking it out? We can talk about everything else, but this crap again we can’t. Grow up

Keep your excuses.

Keep your lies.

I know the script

I know disguise…