Unsent text message to Stephanie

The reality of today is I don’t know if any of those posters for me. I don’t know if any of those responses were for me. I don’t know if I even spoke to him today via post. I don’t ever cared. I don’t know if I ever crossed his mind after he left.

What I do now is that I checked on him so that he knew I cared I reached…

I meant to say devastating, bit disappointing.

Smiling at the stupid memories I have with you and I crave those stupid, real moments with you again.

I look back and they were so few. the sadness hits me, tears start to form, but I'm still smiling remembering them all.

I really wanted forever with you, darling. I still do.

Thinking of you tonight and hoping you're…

i miss you most on nights like this

i just want to call you up and ask you if you wanna join me on an evening wander

i'm hurt by past actions i don't understand. this is true

but i could never ever hate you…

so is that why I was never good enough always secretly hate that why you couldn’t show me any you’ve always hated didn’t wanna say it but now I know that’s why you had to fight until I cried that’s why you never could say you were sore or feel bad about any of it cause you hated me the whole time I don’t need to hear…

To come to terms with the idea that I could bring out the worst in someone. 😔