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I’m sorry that I can’t invite you along to things. I so desperately want to, even if it’s the two of you. Regardless, it’s a chance to get closer. But I can’t even do that without causing trouble on my end. And that hurts. I’m not sure if you see it. I do know you do that, too. There are things you definitely could invite me to, and you don’t. Is this an elaborate dance? Or is it just the way things are? Because even when I’m not there, you still try to make me part of it. I’ve tried. In fact the one thing that worked out, with all of us together, was a great night. You went out of your way to tell me that. But it was so long ago now, and I struggle to find new opportunities. Maybe we both do. I just hope you know that what’s holding me back isn’t by my wishes. It’s by circumstance and others’ feelings. That’s difficult to communicate. But in any case, I don’t just want you to come along. Deep down, I wish it was you. Only you, and me.
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