Unsent text message to Eli

You want to fix it make the effort plain and simple. What you have done to me to protect your pride and ego will never be forgotten.

How's it going? What are you up to? Anything good? Were you thinking of me? It's ok if you weren't.

I'm still stuck on us baby I love you and I miss you so much I want you baby I want you so much

and suddenly, achieving anything in life feels pointless when i can’t tell you about it and hear you say you’re proud of me. i hope you liked the funeral, i didn’t feel you there but hope you were watching. i feel utterly alone in this world without you. i can talk about how i should have been there more but i was…

I Know we can't speak anymore, its not good for either one of us.

I made a mistake that cost me one of the clesest people I had left,

I miss you so so much.. Half of me wishes you find this eventually..

We weren't perfect.. but you so easily became a part of my life when…

And I don't want to live without you.

I don't want us to be part of the past.

I don't want to delete all the pictures of us.

I don't want to be sad, looking at all the pictures of us…