iMessage
I'm not gonna send this to you since feelings are still fresh, but it really was just unfortunate timing. It was literally the perfect recipe for our relationship to come to an end. If I could go back and change some of the things that happened, I would, but I can't.
But I think it was always gonna end like this though. I was attached, you weren't. Trying to decipher your behavior was maddening, one minute it was good the next I'm trying to figure out where I stand with you. I'm sorry I crashed out like that. I've never done something like that before. I just couldn't cope, your silence took me back to being a kid, screaming out into the void to just want to be heard. Seen.
From my perspective ik I was valid in feeling how I felt, but so were yours. And despite everything I said. You still said some very nice things in your message. Ik I questioned whether or not you actually cared, but you proved that you did, and I'm sorry for doubting that. It's just hard you know? I didn't realize I needed so much validation, especially because it wasn't always clear.
I appreciate you leaving the door open for us to rekindle, but you're right, I do have to work on myself. I have to live in the present. It was easy to fantasize about our potential, because we had so much, but the reality of it was, I wasn't getting what I needed. And neither were you. And the reality of it now is that it's over between us. There's no coming back to what we once had, but I hope if we do find each other again, we can build something even stronger.
You might not believe it right now, but I really do wish you the best. Take care.
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