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We haven’t been together in almost 2 years now and yet here I am wondering what went wrong. I thought about texting u a bit ago, just to say I made it. You always said I wouldn’t make it in the army, well guess what mf. I made it and I’m thriving now. I’m happier now than I ever was when we were together. But why do I still want to know why? Why can’t I just let what you did go? I don’t get it. I’ve had other partners since us, but I can’t ever let them get close because of you. I’m talking to an amazing girl now and our past relationships came up. I don’t know how to explain everything to her without seeming desperate or dumb even tho I was. I knew you cheated every time and still let you come back. I let you manipulate me, abuse me, and break me down in every way possible even while I knew you were sleeping with ur ex boyfriend. I don’t know why I didn’t leave. I should have been out the door the second I found out. But for some reason I stayed. I even got a better job to try and support your lifestyle when u wanted a better house. I paid all the bills while u drove around on my dime and did nothing but bring other guys home. And when u wanted your friend to move in, I didn’t say no. I said as long as they help out I don’t care. I still ended up paying for everything while getting ******* at for not remembering to clean a litter box after a 15 hour shift. Why the **** did I stay with you for all those years?? I genuinely don’t know what I was thinking. I can say this tho, thank you for destroying me mentally. You have made it to where I can’t trust anyone anymore. I’m thinking about just telling the new girl that I can’t be with her. I don’t want to experience the hell you put me thru again. I can’t do it again.
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