Unsent text message to Austin

You betrayed me in a way I couldn’t even conceive. If it had been anyone other than you, I could have handled it better. You destroyed me. Why did it have to be you?

Sometimes I really think about k— myself. Just to make it stop. I would never do it I’m not that weak. But it weighs on me. Today I thought abt h— from the tree at that house. Too many people would miss me. Maybe not that many. Just my family and maybe a few people Ive met a long the way. I’ve wronged everyone I’ve…

I pretended that I couldn’t see You slipping away and looking at me differently

See it’s not that I’m mentally inept as you probably think. I just hoped in the end you’d pick me. As pathetic as that is, it’s different with a kid and though I’d seen that the fairytale may no longer be, he still had stars in his eyes…

Seems like a lot of fighting tonight...

I don't know what to think. I just know that I care about you. Ngl you still confuse me. You won't text me or call. I'm left with no answers, just assumptions. Its maddening. All I can do is be your sunshine. Somehow I feel like that is what you need most. 🌻 🌻

You know what, I hate not talking to you.