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Unsent text message to Alexis

To Alexis ·

Alexis

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I don’t understand and I’m struggling to set it aside: I ask you to go look at the moon because it’s breathtaking, I tell you I miss you because I do, and you tell me it’s “dehumanizing.” I genuinely do not understand.

How can you, and you have—always, taken everything beautiful and turn it so ******* ugly? I know we are no longer in each other’s lives, but what is this need for such ugliness?

Why?

I’ve wished you well, I haven’t argued with your claims or decisions, I have let you be… and why do you still need to have so much blood at every single turn?

I know more than you think I do. I still manage to love you. Maybe you hate that?

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