Unsent text message to Amanda

or if you even cared. but you didn’t. and your text back to me said so. i was hoping that you would fight. fight for me. fight for this. but you didn’t.

I catch myself checking my phone for a message that isn’t ever coming.

I was so happy to have you back in my life and hopefully vice versa. But the way you just let it…

How you already moved on. It’s been not even a week. You never posted me. You blocked me and posted her. You never complimented me, but I’m sure you compliment her. Was i just convenient like everyone said? Was i really just that easy? How could something so real be so fake? All these rhetorical questions run through…

I keep going over everything in my head, I attempt to look at it all in a rational and logical way but then there is something not quite right, something missing, something inconsistent that makes me feel overwhelmed with confusion. Then I cry.

It should be getting easier for me by now, not harder, not more painful. It…

To the man I once loved,

It's insane how drastically my perspective on life has changed. I always believed I didn't want to date, or get married, or even like romantic gestures. I've come to realize I just didn't want those things with you. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I think I knew I wasn't safe with you. I…

I love listening to music and especially when you send me songs though it’s sometimes hard to read them you make them sound so beautiful and never really thought about lyrics that much and it’s really put me in a rabbit hole because I like how sentimental they are and I’ve recently listened to this song named future…

You always hear about people “loving” someone because it’s convenient.

I wonder if there are people out there who choose “not” to love someone because it’s inconvenient.

I wonder sometimes if I’m not loved because I am inconvenient. I get it, you’re busy. But no one is that busy, especially if you have time to internet…