Unsent Text Messages - Page 64

You literally take forever to answer anything. Lol I’m very impatient. I’m anxious and excited to speak to you, but I feel I have to hold back. You answered once a couple days ago, frickin finally!! lol

I’ve missed you a lot and I’ve hated not having you in my life. I got tired of the control and anxiety keeping you…

Your birthday is at the end of October. You lost your mom when you were 16. You like cars like it's oxygen. You have the best laugh I've ever heard. You fit up against me like you're the other half of me. You have the most perfect, unique eyes. Ive never seen eyes that come close to yours. We met when we were kids…

I wish I could reach out and undo all the hurt I caused. I wished we had met under different circumstances in a world that didn't require us to alter ourselves to survive. I hate that I decided we weren't fighting for because I was afraid that it meant many disappointments. I just didn't want to keep competing when…

I have a tendency to fantasize...

Anytime Ive ever been single I daydream about someone until they get a girlfriend or I find someone else. I've daydreamed about you for so long. You're gorgeous. Why wouldn't I? And those thirst trap weight lifting videos you posted? Ugh. Love them. So ******* much haha. You quit…

It’s been two ******* hours of me getting my hair pulled. Scratched trying to get (daughter) to sleep. You haven’t bothered to check up on me because you are so content sitting around with her. I’m getting to the point where I’m beginning to wonder why the **** am I still even here. You guys would be better off just…

Hey buddy. What u been into?not much here just living my life and loving every ******* second. How long are u going to keep up the charade? I know that u been ******* her. I've known you for years. I know when you're lying. You get awfully quiet when her name comes up. Just drop the stupid act. It isn't necessary. You…

I guess the better question is “how many times do you have to show me that you do not want this”? The answer should be one. For you, and him, and him, and that other guy too.

I hate how jaded I’m becoming. It will suck if someone new comes along that is even remotely interested in love. I want to be who I am. Does…

Did my absence really affect you that much?

I feel it was you…

But I’m not sure either…

But I think it was…

You mishandled me when I truly felt so certain you wouldn’t… it broke me in a different way than I’ve felt before because I’ve not trusted another completely. For weeks now all I want to do is lay in my bed when I’m not forced to be doing other things out of obligation and responsibility.

The saddest part of that I…

Girl…I just want a hug from you…nothing else. It’s hard to face there will never be an us - EVER. There’s something I feel about me and you. Boundaries set in ink across the board won’t allow it. Plus, you would think I was crazy if you knew what my feelings were.

You said nerrdy guys break your heart the worst. Is it still true? Its funny bc u didn't see it coming. It crushede to do it. I have been struggling with it for a month. Remember you said "he tou didn't kiss my forehead when you woke up?" Well thats why. I can't believe you thought i waa going to let that slide. What…

Don't tell me it's still hard for you... Bc it's not. Clearly. Hope you had fun.

Idk why I can’t just trust, and into a new life thrust All my, effort, all my love cause it feels like I’m Still floating, but I know you pulled out the rug! I hung along and reached my point, I love you but this ain’t it, I’ve seen love , it don’t quit, not through ups , all over you through downs showing, you’re not…

Roberta, Debbie, Alexis, or Bobbie?

You're all fake.

Not sure what kind of person treats someone the way you treated me. It cost my mental health a lot of money. But I forgive you

Hey.

I was drunk last time I was here. Drunk and missing you.

You deserve more than drunk feelings. You deserve sober ones. I've always had a hard time showing the soft underbelly of my feelings. I know I hurt you by refusing to roll over. Never wanting to show my hand. Always wanting plausible deniability. You deserve…

It means a great deal to me that you asked about my son. He'll be alright. Better when he's back to routine.

I wish I could truly tell you how deeply I really appreciate you... But, you know. I don't want you feeling weird with me.

You'll be alright too. We both know that. And I'm always here for you. In whatever…

It’s four days until a month since you’ve responded back to my last message before you went ghost. I would’ve preferred to at least be blocked so I know there’s no more “us”. But my texts go through, just no response. For my own sake, I’m going to believe that your Iphone 11 finally took its last breath and you forgot…

Would you ever wanna talk even though the fire will stay dead? I'm hard to find these days but I'll make it easy for you only.

I need to hear your voice and know that it was all for real.

You all left bigger thorns in my side than I'd ever anticipated, or with which I was ever willingly to sympathize. I don't know how they got there, without my having surmised, that you would leave such damage, such pain...In a place that held no patience for lies.

No... You were monsters just there, plainly, in front…

I couldn’t understand the distance for so many weeks. It’s happened a few times before. I thought maybe you were just needing the break and I let you have that space, like so many times. This past couple of weeks has had me on cloud nine with you. I was ready to burn the ships…yes, and all the way. I was scared to…

Would you cry or would try and get me? Tell me now I want you to be clear...

It’s been twenty years. We’ve both moved on, both built completely separate lives, and both raised children of our own. It’s been fifteen years since you stopped by my work on your way home from basic training—you were just passing through my state, but you didn't have to stop. Yet you did. It's was the last time I…

L,

I miss you, I think about you constantly, every little thing is a reminder to something we've done in the past, from little details in video games to the topics youd mention all the time. I can't watch certain shows without you on my mind, i can't even date without thinking about how i'd rather be with you. I…

I’m trying hard not to go back to my black hole But I can’t stop thinking about all the harm I did to you after all you’ve done for me, I can’t sleep I barely eat I’ve realized it was me it’s my fault I’m so sorry beautiful, I wish I could just tell you this but I’m sure you don’t even want to hear from me. And I’ll…

I wanted to wait to write you something long, detailed, genuine and heartfelt

I still will tonight but…

I’ve just missed you so much in the interim I’m coming here

It’s hard to concentrate on anything right now…

Something in the way you talk

makes every warning rise,

you paint your lies in pretty words

and hide them in your eyes…

when i’m awake i think of you. so i got to sleep & i dream of you.. im in hell. i miss you so much :( please come back

Today I needed a lighter. To smoke my legal. I picked white for death—change. The death of the old, so the new can grow. Though I am terrified not so much of change but of comfort, not of the future’s uncertainty but its very possibility. What needs to die is this—harboring you in my heart, an empty boat, abandoned

Casually never bore causality. I have never owned the ability to be any less consumed. Bring me to my doom, light the fire; I'll just smile, as my ashes sparkle in the plume.

I hope you keep me blocked forever. I hope you never bother me again. I didn't realize it was all fake to you or I would have never talked to you in the first place. I never had an intention of making you feel obligated to me. I thought we were having fun and falling in love. I didn't realize that you were saying all…

Is that I miss you too much and I want to hug you again. That I am reflecting on what happened and how I can do better next time if I get a next time. And how I’m working on accepting that there most likely won’t be a next time.

I wanted to tell you that you’re awesome and remind you that you’re handsome.

But I can’t…

I’ll communicate better next time.

I’ll ask more.

I’ll check in more.

I’ll look more…

Regardless of what you convinced people of never forget. All evidence backs my events, no matter how little people want to hear it.

There is a profound, interwoven connection between low folic acid(folate), coercive control, and post traumatic stress disorder. When a person experiences the severe, chronic stress of an…

Hey D,

Near the end, I couldn't help but feel like there was a lot that you kept hidden away inside. I regret that it took me so long to notice. Loss came up a few times in our conversations, and so did mental illness, but you never shared what you had been through. I wish I could have been someone you felt comfortable…

AHHHH YOU TEXTED ME YOU TEXTED ME!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEE IM SO HAPPY! SO HAPPY!! EVEN IF IT WAS JUST TO BE NICE IM SO HAPPY!!! PLEASE TEXT ME AGAIN, PLEASE? IM BEGGING YOU. LET ME TELL YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY LET ME BE IN YOUR PRESENCE. YOU'RE LIKE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL STORM, SO BEAUTIFUL ID CHOOSE YOU OVER A SUNNY DAY EVERY…

It’s you, it’s always you.

And when you leave this world, may no more tears fall in your name… as you fade from memory, may all those you harmed find peace and light once more.

You left for a few days and decided we’re over, that I’ll never understand. No discussions, no try just over. But maybe that’s who you always were and all I ever had was a facade. Now where I should be look forward to a future with you all I see is a blank horizon. My memories of you sullied by skulking and…

Time for me to fall asleep I just can’t stay awake

I saw an invite an opening to chat. Yet no words. I’m so confused over everything.