Unsent Text Messages - Page 67

You were going to tell me how your thing today went

I’m scared that the days without you are becoming more than the days with you.

I’m happy for something that hadn’t happened yet. The rollercoaster buckling of knees feeling. is that love? Or is it anxiety? Call it what you want…

Would our diagnosis trauma-bond us and crash our spirits, or would we end up being good peer support to each other?

I just wanna hold you, hug you, make love and take care of you.

I am afraid of hurting your fragile soul and vise versa, and I am really starting to fall in love with everything you are and everything I…

Its funny, I catch myself. Just about to enter a deep slumber. Suddenly, I'm jolted awake as if I were about to be pegged by the one I used to call my person. Its funny we all know what our person thinks. Perhaps we could be on that wavelength, that connected. Perhaps we are simply riding a vibe. If you were grinding…

I’m sorry that I can’t invite you along to things. I so desperately want to, even if it’s the two of you. Regardless, it’s a chance to get closer. But I can’t even do that without causing trouble on my end. And that hurts. I’m not sure if you see it. I do know you do that, too. There are things you definitely could…

I sent a message there just a . Just in case.

Although I am starting to realize it’s pointless.

People do what they want and in the end there are so many ways to reach out if indeed one wants to. Yet I reach for empty air.

Even thought I left me and cheated yea I said some **** I were ******* another dude ? I was infuriated *** you expect

I’m alive and I just woke up

You've found me among the leaves,

Lying on a little rock in the lake.

You have captured my heart,

Fixed it and filled with love…

Dear J_ _ o _ (5 letters)

(A_ e _ _ s is another name you go by 6 letters)

Your family memebers reached out to me a few days ago. Ex friends just today. I got sent proof you werent diagnosed with what you told me you were. Our breakup was messy and toxic, but you made it that way. And then after 2 weeks of no contact i…

how's everything going? Whatcha been up to? Week two of classes all done and it feels like I started all over again lol. Driving home makes me think of you, I wish I'm on the way for one of our hangouts everytime I see the turn for your street. Feels weird that you're not there anymore.

i know we talked a bit about it last night in between our bantering but I was serious. I do want you to pursue me. make me feel as wanted and loved as i do for you. I know you say you feel the same and eventually want to do so… but why not start now? that playful intimacy we have with each other is important to…

Every time I’m over it and I start feeling better, I see you. Today you were at my gym, we ignored each other as if 6 months ago we weren’t sleeping in the same bed. I wish you’d come up to me and talk to me, I know I never will. I need to have more respect for myself. You are a cheater, and I know I said I forgive…

How have you not figured this out yet? It's been nearly a year. This is so simple. Come on.

We can fix this.

One chat. Just give me that. One long walk on the downs.

Aren't you curious about why all of this is happening? Don't you want to see if we can make it…

I always loved the way you looked at me, but now you dont. Eyes that once sparkled when I walked into the room, now do their best to avoid me.

I always loved the way you laughed with me. Now everytime I hear it, it feels like youre laughing at me.

I always loved the way you smiled. Now when I see you smile I know its…

Why are you still here? You don't hold onto "us" in any regard. The marriage isn't important to you. You hold onto the completed divorce paperwork like it's a security blanket. You spend your evenings on the opposite side of the house. Don't you want a whole space that's yours? Don't you want to be able to live the…

stop talking to me like i'm 5. i'm an adult. i don't need to be lectured.

I guess no answer is my answer

When I open my eyes in the morning. That I no longer hear you.

I’m just saying that all I want is to **** it out. It’s not even that deep anymore. It’s just the fact that you have to keep it up for your ego.

I find it hard to hate someone in general let alone a person who was apart of everything good & bad throughout years of my life. I know it isn't the same for everyone, but even if I had a million reasons I would still find the few good parts & dwell on them instead because truth be told they saved my life in a lot of…

Remember i told you I'm from the future.? Your Wednesday is my Thursday. Your day today is my yesterday. Its hard to get your mind around bht i know you can do it. I told you that from the start. You don't have any right to hold it against me now. I already know what you will do today because it's my yesterday.

Don't make a big deal out of it.

Okay. Bye.

I don't want them to define me.. which is why I'm trying really hard to change myself but, it seems that I can't even let the people from my past go. Like you, S. I can't let you go for some reason. I don't even know why, whether it's love or just the fact that someone, at least someone knows me and what I've done. I…

I saw the post you made and I want to make things very clear to you. The facts are is that you are continuously trying to make your bf cut off his only family because you’re not getting “enough attention” although you are with him everyday so honestly it’s pretty disgusting. You are not family, you are a gold digging…

Are you happy? are you good? do you eat well? so you sleep well? do u ever regret leaving me for her? did u stop drinking and become a good familly man? Those are questions that i wonder often, even after so long time, i want it to stop, im tired carrying this trauma all by myself, while you probably never think of me…

When does missing you suddenly stop? When does loving you suddenly stop? I’m not really sure if it does.

Days just become weeks and weeks suddenly become years. Years without you, your touch, your sweet sweet kisses. Those kisses get me in trouble, let me tell ya. As much as I cry, I have such a big smile looking back…

I wish I was taller so I could climb to trees faster.I wish my karate skills we're more mortal Kombat style but I guess Kraft Maga will do .Witch hazel but there will be a Manga after this .The 9 heroes style it's more my vibe . I dream in color ,she can hide her shades ,but not her true character .But I don't blame…

you weren’t a good person to me but you were a good person in your own way and i saw that

i just wish you didn’t have to break me apart so much

The blood dripping from my palm felt so right, replaying the same desperate, hopeless song. Work to be done, no understanding to string along; I **** ****** today, to see if I still feel... All the more glad that it's not where I belong, but the damn place gave me you. Alas. I will hold strong.

Just stop texting me...😪

remember when you asked me what you can do to help me handle your times where you need isolation? remember my response, where i said needing alone time is healthy normal and perfectly acceptable to me? emotional abandonment isn’t, especially when you are dealing with someone with BPD. and do you remember that we…

I love you and I don’t know how you’re knowingly doing this to me right now. You’re such a coward. I just wish you would come home.

we're at the stage of things where i've finally started opening up to other people. where enough bait has been dangled for me that i'm hanging on the hook, gasping for air. and i'm being reminded that there's no chance for it to be me. so now i've started rejecting people i would have said yes to, again. and the next…

It’s literally the most precious thing I’ve ever heard. It just sounds like a melody the intonation, the pitch, everything about it. It’s so funny that you can sound like an angel while simultaneously being Lucifer’s baby. 😂 I miss you.

Wasnt a show Was a game I want my prize Bunch of sore *** losers

I cannot deny the value of the nights beneath the moon, glaring with that sparkle in my eyes wondering if it was real.

Knowing what I know now, I know it was all in my mind. Gaslighting yourself because it fills a void must be part of my pattern.

Your pattern is destroying anything that grow, by choosing not to care…

I’ve moved on and I’m happier now. He’s someone I’ve been friends with for years that I’ve always had feeling for but I never thought anything would happen or that he’d ever feel the same. I think you’d have liked him if you had gotten to meet him before things ended between us. We’re trying to take things slow…

even recognize each other anymore

we didn’t know each other

we just sleep walked together

for a strange moment in time.