Unsent Text Messages - Page 51

i wasn't angry today, i was sad. maybe you'll figure out why i'm so sad. and you'll be sad too. or maybe you already are.

With love.

p.s. amazon says your "gift" is shipped

How do I stop loving you?? My heart yearns for you and I don’t know how to make It stop. No amount of self love, isolation, and gaslights, or depriving myself of my feelings is working. Am I underestimating how much I loved you?? it’s been so long since you’ve left in my eyes, I wonder what you’re doing right now…

I wish I was taller so I could climb to trees faster.I wish my karate skills we're more mortal Kombat style but I guess Kraft Maga will do .Witch hazel but there will be a Manga after this .The 9 heroes style it's more my vibe . I dream in color ,she can hide her shades ,but not her true character .But I don't blame…

Explain why, the purpose, the logic behind it all? How are your actions justified?

It doesn’t take much anymore girl….All I needed was 5 minutes to chat with you. It made my day. Keep being you and thank you. ☺️

You meant so much to me, and I think one of the hardest parts of this is knowing that I didn’t mean the same to you. That doesn’t make what I felt any less real. I adored you, and will never regret that. I know what I felt was real; it just wasn’t shared.

Am I crazy that I’m not over you yet? Or is it just a part of a grieving process. Like I know you’re not dead but I still miss you even though it’s been 6 to 7 months. I just want a conversation with you and that’s all. Probably, uncovering some voicemails does me no good but I have to hear you sometimes. Maybe you…

If reacting to stories is considered friendship, I don’t want it. Sending meme’s would count. Playful banters and dark humour, yes please.

I get it. If you don’t want to write back it’s just clear as day that you don’t see me even as a friend. Though we tried being more than friends and it didn’t work out. Finding…

I'm going to stand up for myself. You don't get to go run your mouth off about me to your now ex boyfriend about things I said to you in confidence. Fuxk that. **** you. How dare you. How fuxking dare you. I wont just lie down and ******* take it. **** you. Im already homeless. There isn't much more I could loose. My…

I wanted to say hi. How are you doing? But I don't have the guts to talk to u again. You have done very well in your life and I am happy for you. But I could not reach anywhere close to you till now. I am working hard to reach your level, then only I will be able to talk to you again. I have lost my charisma and have…

I always have to tell a lie. I think it would help in the long run, to spare your feelings. But the truth is life’s never really work out. The truth always comes out. So please listen to my truths

You want asked if it felt good I said, of course, baby, you make me feel better than anyone Truth is it was weird as ****…

I guess the better question is “how many times do you have to show me that you do not want this”? The answer should be one. For you, and him, and him, and that other guy too.

I hate how jaded I’m becoming. It will suck if someone new comes along that is even remotely interested in love. I want to be who I am. Does…

Everything people spread about me- I can see how they would get that and run with it- but- there’s two sides to everything and the failure lies in not seeking out the shared truth on both sides. Then running with their preferred truth as fact-spreading it- feeding off people’s validation- falsely making themselves…

I was lazy often, I was terrified often, I was weak often and I was reactive often. I am responsible for myself and I put way too much of how I felt on you. We needed marriage counseling when we were together but we never took the plunge. We knew our own faults and wanted to live in the delusion that the other was to…

Welp. All those playlists we shared, the ones you asked for, ones i just made to be nice, don't mean anything to you? Today i saw you aren't on them anymore as a collaborator or saved by you. Kind of broke my heart because i really did hope that some day we could be friends again, even though i told you i didn't know…

Sometimes I wish I had your number. Not so I could say anything dramatic. Just a simple hello. I wonder what I’d do if I could actually reach for my phone and send it. Would you smile when you saw my name? Would you wonder why I was messaging you? Would you reply straight away… or leave me staring at my screen…

I should have said "Yes" sooner.

Your name might be a bird but you aint no dove, everytime you come over, we be making love, she got me addicted to crisco (nothing rhymes with crisco)

I was searching for something in my phone and came across this..

If you had a problem with me, we could've talked about it like adults. If you wanted to end things, then just say so. Instead you ghosted me. A coward's way out. I'm disappointed in you.

I asked you for space before you went on a trip that we planned and were supposed to take together. I didn’t want to talk until you got back because your rebound decided to surprisingly buy a ticket to meet you in Ireland. Instead you reassured me before you left that you were ending things with rebound before you…

I miss you so much hamza. Where are you my love? Why do you have to stay there where you are so stressed and not really free? Why do you put up with that feeling as if it is a necessary part of your life? I go around and around just to end up wanting you and only you. I hope you stay safe forever. Stay safe and wholly…

Acceptance.

I know you're with her, and I think to myself, maybe it's for the best. It probably is. You deserve someone that could be there for you. Someone strong enough. Someone whole and completed.

I won't always be here, even if I am. I'll go stand in the corner, eyes low and accepting. It's weird, knowing you'd be…

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. no not anymore? ha ha ha ha. scary cat. ha ha ha ha.

We have been there for you. Best friends. We shared everything. We supported you - when other friends were terrible to you, called you names, criticized your parenting, fought constantly with you. We watched you time and time again go back to these friends until finally they crossed a line that could not be undone. We…

I did feel a "click", or whatever that means.

I would have been willing to go through the pain if it meant experiencing the good parts.

About that day: I know what you mean. There are certain memories of that day which are stuck in my mind.

My mind has been a jumble too. I find it's worse when we haven't been speaking…

I like you. I really like you. I just don’t think our communication styles kind up. I want to know what you’re doing through your the day, if you’re thinking of me, to be told when you’re busy. I want you to want that too. So asking for it seems a bit disingenuous. You also don’t ask me many questions about myself. I…

When I said you seen my deepest darkest demons, that wasn’t consent, that was expression of the trial you put me under. You took my demon and treated it like the king of hell.

You didn’t care, You didn’t love, You didn’t contribute, You didn’t have compassion, You didn’t have emphaty,

You were so caught up in the wrongs…

So tell me that it mattered, that I meant something to you

Because you’re all I can see

If its not you, I don’t want it

I can’t move on…

How can someone spend 7 years with someone

Match with someone else online whose states away

Meet them for the first time and ultimately move in with them that day

Without a job…

but i still hate you

I’m not married anymore, I’m SINGLE and divorced just like you wanted. Where are you? I’m available now and alone for a long time now and now you’re gone.

Or will you be relieved When all of me is gone, Gone for good.

For nothing. Twice in one day. Got all excited for a false fantasy.

The last time we spoke, you made this very clear. That's ok. I accept that you see me as a "bad" individual. I accept that my influence on your life wasn't good. I am sorry for the effects, both long and short term, that our relationship may have had/still has on you. I know you're too tough to linger there for long.

I…

Hey, I miss you so much. You were my first serious relationship, I don’t hold a grudge against you for burning out or getting tired of us because I played a part in that too.

I’m trying to respect your decision but I can see that this is painful for you as well. You said you still love me, and I believe it, otherwise…

I told you time and time again, to stop messing with that because it wasn't right. Not to mention all the universes rules u guys broke. May the ultimate divine have mercy on you and all those you tricked and lied to, so they could join you on this kamizae mission. It didn't work the first couple of times and it's not…

I just wanted u to know that i appreciate u sm!! I always felt like everyone else was saying it to be nice. But i believed you when u said. I was definitely sus at first but now i believe you. I realize that power i now hold in my um...

.hands. i promise to only use it's power for good. I never would have known…

I don’t want to see you at all. After everything that you’ve done, I refuse to see you ever. The way you traumatized me for months is ****** up. And what’s worse is that you’re going to invalidate my feelings. Yes, I know it’s true because you’ve tried to manipulate me to believe otherwise about your actions. I am…

I know you all know the real me and you’ve probably started noticing what a manipulative lying pos I am turning into. One who’s selfish, cold and in a constant state of melancholy.

I am scared ******** , but this is something I did to myself. I don’t want to cause anymore hurt. All of you mean the world to me, and I…

I know you all know the real me and you’ve probably started noticing what a manipulative lying pos I am turning into.

One who’s selfish, cold and in a constant state of melancholy.

I am scared ******** , but this is something I did to myself. I don’t want to cause anymore hurt.

All of you mean the world to me, and I…